Direct Fail
How did they manage to send me the same flyers three times on the same day? Well, how about by getting every single instance of my (previous) address wrong in a slightly different way? →
April 2008
Cluetrainwreck
When a phrasing like this is (a) so unlike normal speech, and (b) repeated so often, it's pretty clear that it's being used as a matter of policy. Some meeting was had to whiteboard the perfect response that sounds concerned and proactive, but admits absolutely no fault on the part of the carrier. →
Command History Meme
Feeling old... →
When life approximates xkcd...
Ways not to answer the question: "Do you love me?" →
Twitterpated
Dear Sir and/or Madam, I noticed that you decided to "follow" me on Twitter. Not knowing who you were, and mindful of the possibility you may be a friend, colleague or net.acquaintance using an obscure handle, I visited your Twitter homepage. →
Firefox Bug 426702
Never underestimate the power of rote learning. →